Days On, Days Off

On my days off, I try, and sometimes fail, to stay far away from my computer.

My days on are always at least 10 hours long, and usually well over 11. (That's because of a delightful feature known as "Mandatory Overtime", which I may explain some other time). They are very intense workdays. The calls themselves require a great deal of focus, and are nonstop: one call ends and another one begins immediately; I can sneak in a drink from a waterbottle while the phone rings if I'm quick, but eating a banana is usually out of the question. I get two 15 minute breaks and a half-hour lunch. During these times I try to go outside briefly ,because feeling air on my skin is really important.  And I try to look at small things that are far away, so that I can practice focusing my eyes because otherwise they ache and get strained by staring at the computer screen.

Typically near the end of my work week it gets more and more difficult to complete sentences; my brain starts to lose it's ability to form connected words, and also I start to lose my voice. Sometimes at the end of a shift my language skills are so depleted that I can barely talk; during my first month I'd be so tired as to be nearly catatonic and drooling.

On my days off I'd have anxiety attacks and sudden fits of depression. The last couple weeks, my days off have actually felt enjoyable, like weekends, and I've only felt a little depressed at the end of the time off, realizing I'll need to go back on calls again. So things are getting better.

This sort of thing is probably normal for most folks' jobs. Perhaps I've just been lucky in the last decade.